5 Moments That Made Me Stop And Realise I Was A Mother (other than actually having a baby)

Elliot’s nearly five now, so I have come to terms with the fact I’m not the young, hip creature I once was. (Correction: I may have once been young, but I have never, ever been “hip” and I think using the word only accentuates that fact.) I know that I’m fully into the world of parenthood and I relish it, it’s great fun. But sometimes I stop and think “god, I really do sound like a mum..”


  • Getting ready to go out. I’ve gone full circle, from my mum shouting up the stairs at me “have you got your socks on!?” to me standing at the bottom of the stairs bellowing “PANTS, SOCKS, NOW!!” at 8:25 when we’re meant to be half way down the road. My neighbours must think Elliot is a fully fledged nudist as they must just hear me repeatedly telling him to please get dressed all day long.
  • Yesterday, I actually heard myself utter the words “you need a rocket up your arse, lad.” I actually had that thought and said those words to my child.
  • I’ve been shopping around for new styles of jeans because after approx. 10 years of squeezing my rather sizeable hips into black skinny jeans, I’ve delved into the world of the Mom jean. Clue’s in the name, I suppose. (I do feel a bit traitorous wearing something that doesn’t look like it was spray-painted onto  my legs, but that’s a 2008 emo kid thing.)
  • I think I may have somehow gained super strength over the past four years, because the Hayley of 2011 sometimes struggled to open a door without whinging. NOW, I can successfully carry my four year old son, a scooter, two coats and a handbag without batting an eyelid. (Okay, there’s a lot of huffing but I can do it, okay.)
  • The sudden excitement over the mundane. Honestly, I never thought I’d get excited over cleaning products, but I swear I nearly cried the other day because Elliot was throwing my rhubarb Method spray around the front room and cracked the bottle, but then nearly exploded because I found a spare one under the sink! I think also the fact I keep spare cleaning products under the sink is a whole other point. Also, I really want a spray mop for my kitchen and am almost tempted to put it on my birthday list…but I don’t know if I’m there yet.

Are you starting to feel like you’ve finally accepted your fate? Let me know, and if you’ve got any mop recommendations, let me know 😉

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